"Absolutely not!",I tell Ken. Hilary, our six year old granddaughter, had just left our house. She lives across the street so she can travel alone. Hilary and her Papa had just returned from Saturday errands, which primarily consisted of a trip to Petsmart.She was SO HAPPY, she told me because her Papa had promised to buy her a snake. She had already met this snake and held him. "That's great!", I told her, picturing her tending the reptile in her precious bindi like way. "But what will your Mom say?" "Oh he's going to live here at your house" looking at me enviously. "That's what Papa said." Oh sweet girl, Papa is out of his ever loving mind,I am tempted to say but I don't.. Her papa is an animal lover of the nth degree. Although he freely admits patience is not his strong suit, if any horrible deed is committed by any member of the animal kingdom he laughs it off. I can just see them now at the mega sized pet store, making plans and anticipating wonderful times with their new soul mate.
"Five dogs are enough," I tell him. "I just can't do a snake. Just feeding it will be a HUGE pain. Having to store dead animals and all." In my defense, it should be noted,that we just don't have five dogs. We have five of the worst of the canine species: a paralyzed dachshund named Pearl; Grace,a whippet, who is a nervous wreck and shouldn't be around other dogs; Rico,a street dog so clever we have to put kiddie locks on the cabinets; Freida, a blind Mexican hairless who has a blood disease requiring expensive meds and monitoring and Tutter, her litter mate who was taken from her mother at age 2 weeks and has not developed properly(I'll spare you the details) Yes... that's what this house needs, a snake.
"Hilary I don't think we can have a snake at the house right now"(couldn't shut the door completely, I am so codependent). Bitterly disappointed, she tells me bravely with a sweet smile,"that's okay. maybe mom will let me get him."
This happened about a month ago and this morning I found a homework assignment of Hilary's. The teacher had given them the title: IF I HAD A RANCH IN TEXAS. It was in booklet form and turning the pages I read of Hilary on her ranch,(wonderfully illustrated by her 6 year old hand),how she had horses and all sorts of animals on her ranch. But she also had ponds full of frogs that she sold. One potential customer, Veronica had already bonded with a certain frog, but her mom said no. But Hilary knew exactly what to do, she THREW the frog at the car, as it left the ranch and the frog followed Veronica home to live happily ever after. I felt genuinely sad that Petsmart employees aren't flinging snakes in the parking lot.
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